Anna

as soon as i paid the 4 dollar toll to go over the bay bridge i started crying..
i was so happy to be in sf. but now im super sad. my heart hurts a LOT. like im actually feeling pain in my heart. i can't get over him. this city isn't going to make me get over him...

the drive was good.
my car is COVERED in bugs.

i managed to find a parking spot in front of sallie's...sorta.
i got an interview at urban outfitters for their visuals department on sunday...
i hope that goes well. i need a fucking job. it'll make things much better.

sooo before i found a parking spot i went to go pay at a garage..$60 bucks for a night. nope.
monthly it is $300. yuck.

well im going to go numb myself.
i wish he would say SOMETHING to me.


anna

all i can think about are the things i shouldn't be thinking about.
im so sad and so fucking empty.
when is everything going to be okay?
even if i'm improving on myself what does it matter?
he doesn't notice. he doesn't care.
nothing can fill this void...

Don't forget to vote on tuesday..
and if you're not register...DO IT. DOO IT.

tonight i'm going to head up to santa barbara.
im hoping it'll take my mind off some things.
i also can't be in my apt alone...my insides crawl.
i guess im lonely.
i've been so cranky, tired and just out of my mind that no one wants to hang out with me.
i wouldn't want to hang out with me either. i'm a bully.
tonight i'm going to drink..i'm sure i'll regret it tomorrow morning...

sigh.

so an interesting thing happend to me yesterday...

i went to a casting. hahahahahaha. it was quite an adventure. all i had to do was stand there and let them look at my tattoos and make different expressions into a camera.."just be happy"....."give me a big laugh".."now let me see disappointment...good now let me see you have a secret that you'll never tell"...hahaha. the gig is a for a sandisc photo ad. i guess i shouldn't be speaking about it because i might jinx myself, but whatever. it is 1500 bucks if i get it! there were only 2 other chicks there with 'toos..and if i can shit talk...one girl was haggard and the other girl had way to much make up on and didn't have a lot of tattoos. i was told they wanted someone w/ a bunch of tattoos and that looked 18-24. right on. i guess i for the most part fit that description? Don't know why the casting didn't call that one agency...dragon or whatever...but right on...go me.

sitting in the waiting room was quite interesting. semi preppy dudes that wished they were a bit edgier all gossiping about their agents. this one asian chick that def had way too big of an ego letting EVERYONE that came in that she had gotten there at 11am so she got to go in first...everyone else got there at 2pm. once the sign up list was put out people rushed and pushed. so good. i needed a friend in my pocket to see all this shit..


anyways, wish me luck?

xo

the downward spiral seems to be never ending.

hello. i went to pomona today. traffic getting out of la was fucking ridiculous. the fairplex is an empty condemned version of magic mountain. by the way, i saw a commercial that had someone saying.."i'm so glad it's not closing." publicity stunt? all i know is i need to get another season pass. i went to pomona for the tattoo convention. my friend jason allen with his shop(Bright Ideas) came out from az. this is the first tattoo he's given me. and it is pretty fucking awesome if you ask me! more please......



and by the way. it was painful, but def not the most painful. the worst part was near my big toe. yeah. my foot is throbbing. how fun is work going to be tomorrow?

anna

ps.i hate my toes so stop looking at them.

today ren comes home from new york.
he just called me..he's worried he's going to miss his flight due to a train taking forever.
oh no. as long as he comes home today i will be fine.
he's supposed to come in at 535pm...ca time. it'll be a grand time sitting in traffic, but i won't care.

this also means i must give up all the video chat fun i've been having. haha.
i will be moving back to my prehistoric computer this evening. it'll be fine. i promise.


april 14 and 15th i'm having a yard sale.
it'll actually be a sidewalk sale...


thats the update.

anna

yesterday was my last day of school. no not for the summer. for the rest of my life. i now have a ba and an aa. i did it backyards. not that either mean much to get a job, but they mean something to me. the real world is here now. it is time to begin supporting myself completely. it is time to answer those random phone number calling me..and mis pronouncing my first and last name..demanding i give them 3000 that very second to BEGIN paying off my debt. "can't you just ask a friend to barrow money..this is a serious problem.?" oh really? thanks..i had no fucking idea.

anyways, i am in a very optimistic mood. not even mood. optimistic part of my life. things are looking up and i have so much potential.

im working at the toy store, but i am also going to be sending my resume and portfolio out to places. i want to start assisting prop stylists and then hopefully have my own jobs. i'm also determined not to let what happend to me last time i graduated..happen this time. i need to get out of that slump. it isn't good for the brain....

bye bye.

i had such a good night.
i love my friends. <3
i love my second brain.<3
you know who you are.

hello. im fucking cold. the end.
life is weird at the moment.
i can't really decide what im feeling.
i guess im just sort of anxious...about my future...
school is almost over...thank god...
im def done with my school career for awhile...
now i just need to find an awesome job..or a couple of awesome jobs..
im thinking about freelancing....but i want to find more people to assist before i quit my "day job"....


i accidently ripped the "U" key off ren's lap top..whoops. hehe. it still works though...it is weird typing a "u"...heh.

alright i'm going to bed now..

I'm going to santa barbara today..the sb....i'm really excited.
whenever i go there..everything seems to be okay-it is like my therapy.
i haven't gotten to go in months..and today IS the prefect day to go..minus it being a holiday.
i get to visit some old friends and eat at some fucking amaaaazing places that i miss.
i miss santa barbara life a fucking lot..
sometimes i wish i could go back....

this years has already proven it is going to be interesting...
-already got sick...
-got a parking ticket...
-got a speeding ticket..
-got an assisting/styling job..
-got 2 window dressing jobs..which im super excited about..
-got offered an assisting job during and once i graduate from school in march...

i've also started going to the gym again...have to shed some LBs. seems to be working...

so this year is def. going to have its ups and downs, but i didn't expect this much stuff to happen within the first 11 days...

happy new years!

starting January 4th 2007 i will be going into hibernation until the end of march..which is when i graduate...once again. ive been getting to distracted and not doing well with my schooling. this last quarter wasn't my best. i also need to concentrate on finding a job!!! anyways, so i will not be going out or going on my myspace and i probably won't really be on here either. i will probably check my email..createdbyanna@hotmail.com
so you can reach me there. i will also be communicating with a select few on my telephone.

just fyi..

i had a total of two drinks last night.
i got completely wasted.
i had the spins, but didn't barf.
i passed out on my couch.
went into my bed around 6am.
im hung over...
oh alcohol.

oh man..life just knows how to do it..

Right Now for
Van Nuys, CA (91401)
Fair
100°F
Feels Like
99°F

seriously? when is it going to cooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool down??? like below 75?? hah..i fucking hate heat...

This week so far has proved to be.....noisy. yeah...noisy. yesterday morning...at around 7am my neigbor VRRROOOOM...VROOOOOOM...reved? revd..uh? his car up for about 5 minutes. mind you the parking garage is below EVERYONE's bedroom windows. my crazy neighbor lady went insane.. "SHUT THAT FUCKIIIIINNNG CAR OFF!!!".........."GET THAT CAR A FUCKKKKKIIINNNG MUFFLER!!!"...amazing. he once and awhile will drive this particular car and make all that noise, but i usually just wake up for a min then fall back to sleep. however this morning he did it EXTRA long and the screaming didn't help (although it was pretty amusing). He did it so long the fumes creeped into my bedroom..and well THAT wasn't pleasent. AT ALL!!! then i couldn't sleep. finally after about 20 mins that shit was all over and my neighbors across the way decided to have morning tv VOL 100000000. seriously..then there TWO phones started ringing..and the rings are off...so first one..then the other....ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNND to top all the noise fucking off..i get up and go into the living room..and the apt building on the other side of me..has an apt..where the smoke detector is dying..so it makes that high pitched..BEEP..every so often. that has been going on for a couple of days..greeat.

today..in class...i get handed my midterm..and there is this ANNOYING.. high pitched smoke detector beep that keeps going off, people are hammering in the window displays outside the door, the sink has water dripping......and all i can fucking do is FOCUS on all that!! hah. i did pretty well on my midterm..i know for sure i got one pt off..or maybe it'll just be a 1/2 pt.;D

fuck noise..

now im at work...bored as shit..
come visit?14109 Burbank Blvd.van nuys, ca 91401...it is called The Big Kid. it is a retro toy store...collectables..w/ a 50/60s style living room. popcorn.vintage soda and candy. fun fun fun. come.


anna

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

DUDE i'll be missed by the fucking teenage mutant (brooklyn) ninja turtles.

Sooo..i went and saw him not last night, but the night before. Cool. And that is really all i have to say. <3